Chapter 18 - Going Home
Owen was cleared for discharge four days after his birth.
Leah was cleared the same morning.
No psychiatric hold was issued.
No family guardianship existed.
Doreen was prohibited from accessing Leah’s hospital records.
Dr. Rusk had been suspended pending investigation.
The hospital opened a formal review into every patient file involving Doreen and Dr. Rusk.
Nathan waited outside Leah’s room while she packed.
He did not ask to come in.
Mae folded Owen’s blue blanket.
Simone had been discharged the previous afternoon.
Before leaving, she hugged Leah.
It was awkward at first.
Then neither woman wanted to let go.
“Call me.”
“I will.”
“I mean it.”
“I know.”
Simone looked at Owen.
“You have no idea how much trouble your mother caused.”
Leah smiled.
“For you?”
“For everyone who underestimated her.”
Simone winked.
Then she left.
Rachel remained.
She had arranged to stay in Columbus for several weeks.
Her daughter, now seven, was coming from Oregon with Rachel’s partner.
Leah thought about the strange way families rebuilt themselves.
Sometimes the people who shared blood were the ones who caused the wounds.
Sometimes strangers in silk robes and nurses with tired eyes became the people standing closest when everything fell apart.
Mae rolled Owen toward the exit.
Nathan stood when he saw them.
He looked at Leah.
“Can I hold him?”
Leah stopped.
For several seconds, she watched Nathan.
He was Owen’s father.
That fact could not be erased.
Neither could what he had done.
“Not today.”
Nathan nodded.
His eyes filled.
“I understand.”
Leah walked past him.
Nathan followed several feet behind until they reached the hospital entrance.
Outside, autumn sunlight covered the parking lot.
Leah stopped beside Rachel’s car.
Nathan spoke.
“I’m going to cooperate with everything.”
“Good.”
“I’m selling the apartment.”
Leah looked at him.
“You don’t get to decide that alone.”
“I know.”
“I meant my investment accounts.”
“I’ll repay the debt.”
“That’s between you and whoever you owe.”
Nathan swallowed.
“I’m going to therapy.”
Leah said nothing.
He looked at Owen.
“I love him.”
“I believe you.”
Nathan looked surprised.
Leah continued.
“But love did not stop you from betraying him.”
His face tightened.
“I know.”
“And loving me did not stop you from betraying me.”
“I know.”
Leah opened the car door.
Nathan whispered,
“Is there any chance?”
Leah looked at the man she had once planned to grow old beside.
“I don’t know who you’ll become.”
“But I know who I have to become.”
Nathan lowered his eyes.
Leah climbed into the car.
Rachel drove away.
Briar Glen disappeared behind them.
Owen slept against Leah’s chest.
At a red light, Rachel looked over.
“Where do you want to go?”
Leah thought about the apartment.
The unfinished nursery.
The unopened mobile.
The shelf Nathan had never installed.
“Home.”
Rachel nodded.
Then Leah added,
“But not forever.”
She looked down at her son.
The nightmare returned briefly.
The river.
Nathan holding the baby.
Doreen watching.
Owen falling.
But this time Leah imagined something different.
She reached the water.
May you like
She caught him.
And she walked away.
