Chapter 17 - THE CHOICE DANIEL DIDN'T EXPECT
Three weeks after Clara was born, Daniel received a job offer in Seattle.
A developer wanted him as chief operating officer.
The salary was enormous.
The package included equity.
Most importantly, the company had nothing to do with Charles.
Daniel told Amy during a visit.
"Seattle?"
Amy looked surprised.
"Yes."
"That's far."
"I know."
Clara slept against his chest.
Amy sat opposite him.
"Do you want it?"
Daniel looked at his daughter.
"Before she was born, I would have said yes immediately."
"And now?"
"I don't know."
Amy understood the question hidden beneath his answer.
"If you're waiting for me to tell you what to do, don't."
Daniel smiled faintly.
"Fair."
Amy continued.
"But if you move, we need a different parenting arrangement."
"I know."
"Flights."
"Holidays."
"Emergency decisions."
"I know."
Daniel looked down at Clara.
"I turned it down."
Amy stared.
"What?"
"This morning."
"Why didn't you just tell me that?"
"Because I wanted to know whether part of me was doing it hoping you'd be impressed."
Amy blinked.
Daniel gave a small laugh.
"Therapy is annoying."
Amy smiled.
"You're going to therapy?"
"Twice a week."
"Good."
Daniel nodded.
"I realized I spent my whole life making decisions based on what Dad would respect."
His expression grew serious.
"Then I started making decisions based on what I thought would make you forgive me."
Amy listened.
"Neither is healthy."
"No."
"So I'm staying because I want to be Clara's dad every week."
Amy looked at him carefully.
"That is your decision."
"I know."
"And I respect it."
His eyes lifted.
The sentence affected him more than Amy expected.
"Thank you."
Their divorce mediation began the next month.
Daniel gave Amy the house.
Amy insisted he keep his retirement accounts.
They did not fight over furniture.
They did not fight over money.
Clara was the only issue carrying real emotion.
Daniel wanted three overnight visits each week once she became older.
Amy wanted a slower transition.
They compromised.
For the first six months, visits would be frequent and shorter.
Then the arrangement would be reviewed.
The mediator looked surprised.
"You two are unusually cooperative."
Amy and Daniel exchanged a glance.
Daniel said.
"We already tried the expensive version of conflict."
Amy nearly laughed.
Afterward, Daniel walked her toward her car.
"There's something else."
Amy waited.
"Dad was charged this morning."
She went still.
"Criminally?"
"Yes."
"Accounting fraud and obstruction."
Amy looked down.
"I'm sorry."
Daniel frowned.
"Why?"
"Because he's still your father."
He looked toward the courthouse.
"I don't know what to feel."
"You don't have to choose one feeling."
Daniel nodded.
"Mom said the same thing."
They stood together quietly.
Then Daniel asked.
"Do you ever think about that night?"
"The wedding?"
"Yes."
"Sometimes."
"What do you think?"
Amy considered.
"The ring hitting the floor."
Daniel looked pained.
"I remember that sound too."
Amy continued.
"I used to think that was the moment everything ended."
"And now?"
"I think it was the moment I stopped abandoning myself."
Daniel absorbed it.
"I hate that I was the reason you had to learn that."
Amy met his eyes.
"So do I."
She did not soften the truth for him.
She also did not punish him with it.
Daniel nodded.
"I'll see Clara Thursday."
"Six o'clock."
"I'll bring dinner."
"For yourself."
He smiled.
"I've learned."
Amy drove home.
Margaret was waiting with Clara.
Her divorce from Charles was still moving forward.
She had rented an apartment near the lake and decorated it entirely in colors Charles always disliked.
Yellow kitchen chairs.
Blue curtains.
An absurd orange sofa.
Amy loved the place.
"How was mediation?"
"Good."
Margaret raised her eyebrows.
"Good?"
"I know."
Amy laughed.
"It feels suspicious."
Margaret handed Clara over.
"You two might actually become decent divorced parents."
Amy kissed her daughter's head.
"That's the goal."
That night, after Clara slept, Amy opened her dresser drawer.
A jewelry box sat inside.
Not the engagement ring.
Daniel still had that.
Inside was her father's watch.
Amy held it.
She remembered something he once told her.
Security isn't having enough money that nothing can hurt you.
Security is knowing you can leave what hurts you.
Now she understood.
Amy put the watch back.
Then she closed the drawer.
No ring.
No dramatic promise.
May you like
Only Clara sleeping nearby.
And Amy learning to trust herself.
